Friday, June 19, 2009

A little outside my funny realm

Today was an odd day.

It began as usual. Well, as "summer" usual. Leisurely sleeping in till a whopping 8 AM. Moseying around the house with a complete absence of any urgency at all. Throwing on a presentable gym outfit (you know the type: the one that makes you look fitter and more motivated than your really are) only to wind up putting on flip flops instead of tennis shoes. (I'll hit the gym a little later...I'll run errands now.) Getting Baby Girl ready for Water Fun Day at preschool (which may be fun for her, but it means more morning prep for Mommy, for which I've begun to curse the school) before finally loading up Lady (my Pacifica) and heading off for the morning.

As usual, that is, after my wake-up call. The wake-up call that announced the impending arrival of my future nephew, the soon-to-be-born son of Jethro. They were on their way to the hospital!

On this particular morning, I also had plans to meet a girlfriend for pedis at 11. Around 10 I texted her to let her know that Big Girl would need to join us, hoping that wouldn't be a big deal. She let me know she was at the vet and would get back with me.

A sinking feeling hit my gut. Her precious family dog of almost 18 years has been battling cancer for the past 6 months or so. When I finally heard from her, the situation was not good at all. She cancelled our date to nurse her girl at home. In short, this was the beginning of the end.

Throughout the day, I worried with her. I berated her with text after text, checking in to see how it was going. I ultimately joined her in her pet-sitting for a few hours. It was a heart-breaking afternoon. Together, we concluded, sadly, that this would in fact be her baby's last day on earth. She made plans and we waited for her hubby to return to town.

Meanwhile, I also waited for word on the baby. That excitement (and silence! MEN!!!) felt so odd - even guilty - compared to the sorrow of watching a different kind of "child" pass on.

Finally, ironically, they both made their journeys - at the same time. Both babies passed into another life - one into life on earth and another returned to heaven - around 8:30PM. The long wait was over for both families.

And for me...a hollow feeling. Tears lay stagnant in my heart tonight. It's hard to feel the joy or the sadness right now. Just ...feel.

As I pointed out the irony in the timing of this day, FireDaddy's response was, "What? Are you Hindu now?"

While I wouldn't go so far as to say THAT much, I do believe God "transferred" a few angels today.

May you rest peacefully tonight, baby angels.

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